When everything sucks.

Sometimes unexpected things happen and sometimes it sucks.

When you have in your mind that things are going to go smoothly in a certain direction and then they take a surprise left turn, it  can leave you feeling unsteady, confused, crushed and upset.

A wise woman once told me that on those days when it seems like nothing is right, that life is just negativity piled on top of negativity ask yourself “why is this the very best thing that could happen?”

Before you roll your eyes and stop reading, hear me out. I know how ridiculous this sounds.

Why would a job loss, an injury, a betrayal, an ending of something you loved be “the very best thing”? When we are tied up in stress, anger and sadness, it seems almost impossible to step back and look at a situation objectively.

These are often situations that we can not process until time has passed.

Many of us can look back on a past experience that seemed like the end of the world when it happened. But today, with the benefit of perspective, we can see how the situation turned out for our highest good.

When you’re in the midst of upheaval, the positive side is much harder to see.

Don’t deny your current feelings or try to push them down. Feel your feelings. Know that they are valid. Don’t force the silver lining on yourself or anyone around you who isn’t ready to think about it.

When you have a bit of space, observe the situation from a neutral place. Take a step back and put yourself in the director role instead of that of the lead actor.

 

Ask yourself this question: “Why is this the best thing that could happen?”

Does the job loss create space in your life for you to pursue your passion?

Does the injury mean that you have to take some time to slow down and take care of yourself – something you may have been neglecting?

Does the ending of something good lead to the beginning of something better?

Recognizing this does not mean that you’ll all of a sudden feel great about your current situation or that you’ll immediately get over any hurt that you feel.  Again, it’s important to feel your feelings and process them at your own pace. Asking yourself to look at the situation from a broader perspective forces you to think bigger and, not to ignore your current heartbreak but know that there is life beyond it.

Photo by Justin Veenema on Unsplash

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